i've been feeling so jaded ever since school began and its like near end feb now i can't believe i've held on for two whole months. hockey's so so soo freaking tiring i swear. after training i'm always trudging back home, rushing dinner and bye i'm gone into slumberland. then i wake up the next day aching like crap, falling asleep in lessons and what not. how sluggish. now i've resorted to massive amounts of caffeine (like 2 servings a day) to sustain my open eyelids and its not healthyyyy, i know :( i don't think i'm in much of a position to complain since i don't go for SRC training like kim audrey oli and the rest do and hence they probably train like everyday except sunday or something, but still, I AM VERY TIREDDD.

yesterday's service was great. Pastor Prince preached about resting in the Lord and how when we learn how to do so, God will make all our enemies our footstool! did you know God tells us not to fear 365 times in all in the bible - one for each day, and the ONNNLLLYYYY time he said to be afraid is when we are not at rest? :) well anyway, i thought that the sermon was really powerful, and now i need to APPLY it.

i guess i've been struggling alot lately because of physical fatigue, hectic schedules, deadlines etc. but i can testify that God has been good through it all. i just need to let go and let God take over completely and allow His grace to fully manifest in my life :) the recent months saw me growing closer and closer to God and its really been an inexpressible joy. when i wake up each day and feel so damn defeated, He will just lift me up and give me the strength that i need. i used to not feel a thing in sv but now its different because i know its the same God without the drums and lights and whatever else we have in church. its still worship :) i've never felt like this before through my years as a christian, i used to find it difficult to walk with God then i get really guilty and blah, but now its almost effortless.

ahhhhh, i don't ever want to fall away from Him. :)

When the oceans rise and thunders roar,
I will soar with You above the storm,
Father You are King over the flood,
I will be still and know You are God.

thankyou Daddy God